How the Kids are Growing

Over the last couple of days I've been thinking about the future. Specifically about the future when my kids are grown or almost grown. In the last couple of months I've had a couple of colleagues who have dealt with significant events in their kids lives. One lost his son at the age of 37, after he'd abused his body with drug abuse. Another has seen his teenage girl challenge the boundaries the family has used to raise their children. Finally today, my dad's best friend from high school stopped over for lunch and spent time sharing with mom and dad the plight of their own children.

These events have prompted me to think about my own children, the way my wife and I are raising them, and what we want for them as they proceed into life. I've been a firm believer that parents can do their best, but God's given each person free will to make their own decisions. At some point a parent has to rely on the grace of God to cover what parent's have missed. And when the children make poor decisions, our job is to love them and offer forgiveness.

Several weeks I heard a church class on raising girls. The presenters, a former business man and his wife, talked about how they used a "master plan" for their children. The plan was designed with increasing levels or responsibilities, so that when they were 17 years old they would be making their own decisions. Until that point the parents would ensure that they've progressively equipped their children so that they were ready to make those decisions. As a survey my own children, the oldest one almost ten, I'm nervous thinking that I haven't been equipping my children to be ready to make their own decisions. Obviously each parent does it differently, but I guess the realization is that our time with the children is fleeting. Once they are born, the clock is ticking. With each day, month, and year our influence is lessing. Honestly it's a bit overwhelming.

I'm prayer is that in twenty to twenty-five years, as I sit with old friends sharing pictures and stories, that I'll be proud and glowing about my children and maybe my grandchildren. Twenty years seems like a life time away, but I'm sure it will get here sooner than I think.